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In an attempt to name this post appropriately, I found myself on Google quest, searching through dictionaries, posts and blogs. When the dictionaries failed me, I turned to good old trusted Wikipedia. 

Originally this post was titled “content” but then Wikipedia defined bliss as: “Bliss is an emotional state that is characterized by perfect happiness (feelings of enjoyment, pleasure, and satisfaction,” I couldn’t help overlook the words “perfect happiness.” This led me to attempting to figure out what exactly “perfect happiness” means.

This led me on another Google search, to find out what the 1037345836430480 Google users around the world believe perfect happiness is. 

Let’s just say I found answers from one extreme side of the spectrum to the other. Infamous Yahoo! Questions had a user who posted the question “How to acquire perfect happiness?” and which the best answer chosen by the voters was “drugs or brain damage…. Happiness is a mish-mash of emotions, and it is loosely defined by its symptoms.” 

Google provided me with 41 million (to be exact) pages of results and skimming some of the pages, words such as nature, family, good book, house stood out, there were also debates of “god exists” and “no he doesn’t.” 

Even the Wall Street Journal had an opinion on the matter and  put a monetary value in the mix and reported that “the perfect salary for happiness is $75,000.”

Now I don’t know how happiness can be found through money or books or trees but I do know that no matter who you are, where you live and what you do, all you want at the end of the happy is to be happy and you want to be the real kind of happy. 

Perfectly Happy. 

Always Happy. 

Am I right....? 

The past few months of summertime have taught me so much not only about myself but also about the world. As I had written earlier, while I did land a job that I feel so beyond blessed about, it did tie me down to a M-F, 8-5 schedule coupled with a few health problems meant that discipline and routine would need to become my best friends. 

Often on my drive home from work I would reflect on the day and figure out what I need to do when I get home. When I wasn’t running off to see my personal trainer, it seemed like I was A) cleaning B) grocery shopping C)paying bills or D) cleaning after cooking the groceries I could afford after paying my bills or E)feeling so sick and tired, nothing mattered.

Honestly, when I would sit back, it just all seemed so monotonous and I wondered if this was what everyone’s life looked like too. 

Social media has a powerful ability to create perceptions of happiness and excitement. 

Somehow it seems like everyone on your news-feed looks like a supermodel with a hunky significant other who gets to eats exuberant food without ever gaining pound while traveling the world on the weekends, which is paid by the dream job they landed and they have the energy, health and strength to do it all.

Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter create an illusion that everyone else is a little more exciting than you are. We create profiles on these sites for people to get to know the "real" us but ironically spend so much time attempting to make ourselves seem so exciting that it ends up not being very real at all. We spend so much time keeping up the Jones' and the Kardashians when all we really should be doing is keeping up with ourselve because happiness doesn’t come from a busy social life filled with fun events and parties and friends galore. 

Finding happiness means also finding your personal line of satiation. At what point do you stop chasing and enjoy the walk? Satiation is defined as being “completely full “or “completely filled” and I think that perfect happiness is the ability to live everyday with true satiation. 

Everyone is capable of being satiated but we don’t always chose to. Happiness comes when you live satiated and content. You live with true happiness for every mundane and every thrilling task. You recognize that not every day can be a party. You recognize that some days will be better and some will be worse, but even in the lowest moments, you live with a joy inside that even rainy days can’t wash away.

 

This whole perfect happiness quest seems to be defined by our generation by things, activities or people. People say their friends make them happy or that their dog makes them happy or a bonus check at work or tropical vacations or triple chocolate cake… but do you see the problem? Friends can come and go; your dog will die at some point; checks are cashed in and run out; vacations end and too much cake will make you fat.

All these arguments have a deadline, expiration date or age limit so then why do we count so much on these temporary solutions?

Before I attempt to answer that and give my two cents, here's a line I've heard quite a few times..           

“No-one/Nothing can make me happy but myself.”  

Shifting away from dependence on others for your own fulfillment is a good start, yet people with such mind-sets are perhaps more naïve and worse off than those with dependence on people or stuff. 

The human mind and will is quite a powerful tool that we posses but is at the same time not infallible. 

There is only so much one can carry on his or her own. Health, drive and success all give out at one time or another. People who live depending only on self end up either A) removing themselves from others/ develop deep personal pride or B) crashing and burning upon realizations that they can’t actually do it all themselves. Those who do find success by their own shear wit and skill become prideful individuals. There's this thing in each of us, the ego, and it grows faster than the amount of money the US owes to the People's Republic of China.

There have been moments where it seems like I can do anything I set my mind to and every time I’m on top of the world, life reminds me that I am susceptible to fall at any moment and this is a very tried and true statement. 

We see it repeated all throughout history. Kingdoms collapse, markets crash and even the greatest of bands and artists can’t stay at the top forever. They said the sun would never set on the British Empire and that the Titanic would never sink… and how did that work out?

I don’t mean to depress you, but I do mean to give a little dose of tough love. And maybe at this point in your life you are wondering just who or what you can actually depend on. 

Since we’ve crossed off basically everything off the list, what’s left? This is just what I have been reflecting on/ hearing from people. 

I can’t say I have lived a life where everything has been taken away from me. Even though my health is rocky, I do still have family and friends I can count on. But then I think about those whose parents pass away or divorce or just become strangers or friends who move away or move on. What if on top of everything, my parents and friends were taken away from me? What would I do and what would I become? If I lost all my money? If I lost my limbs and became immobile? 

Last year, Nick Vujicic came to my church (The Rock Church). If you haven’t heard of him, you should really check him out. Nick was born with a rare disorder which left him missing all four limbs. In his sermon he recalled that upon entering the teenage years, he fell into deep depression and even tried to commit suicide at the age of 10. Now 30 years old, happily married and with a newborn son, Nick travels the world proving that a life without limbs is not a life with limitations.

In thinking of my own circumstances and conditions, life has not been easy in any way. 

While there are still events and conditions that I refrain from sharing publicly, I can say that many of these do and will continue to have an impact on every day of every year for the rest of my life. These past few months as I have come home after work have been significant growing periods. 

On the days where I have plans and activities and leave as soon as I get home, well those are the fun days. But on the days where I come home and there’s no one there and laundry is piling up and I’m tired, I used to get upset or disappointed or restless. 

I see the same in so many others. When they run out of money or friends or activities they are board, antsy and simply not happy with life. They just wish the day was over because “nothing is going on today.”

I can be so very guilty of that, of not being in this state of happiness and joy and being satiated with what I do have. Not everyone is doing something super fun or super cool all the time. Social media shields our eyes from seeing the reality of the world we live. It causes us to think everyone else we know is having more fun or doing better in life. And even those individuals who are better and richer and skinner and more famous than us, aren't actuallyy happy. This past summer quite a few celebrities have committed suicide. Clearly the riches and the fame didn't bring them the happiness, joy and peace they wanted. 

Shiny objects only fill us for so long. They don’t bring that “perfect happiness” or a satiation with life.

Personally, I have crossed off everything that others use as their answer for the what brings happiness question. Friends, family, riches, fun, etc were not my final answer.

Perfect happiness or bliss or feelings of fulfillment or joy or whatever you want to call it for me grow and blossom from my foundation in Christ. Going back to my original question of “if I were to lose everything,” I very much have an answer and that answer is that my heart would still remain full of joy. I know it would be incredibly rough and shattering and years of recovery but I also know that every step of the way, my eternal father would be holding my hand. 

Maybe you don’t believe me or think “well that’s good for you” and that’s fine, we are all entitled to our own opinion. But you tell me how many times your friends or your family or your work or your kids or your stocks or your spouse have disappointed, frustrated or stressed you out. Could you honestly tell me “never”?

When I mentioned in the opening paragraphs of this post that we all “have the ability” to live satiated, I wasn’t being fully honest. This ability is enabled when you ask for Christ to join you on your own journey. What a guy, huh? Not only did he die for you, but also gives you the ability to live in joy on Earth no matter the mess and chaos around you. I’d say that’s quite a bargain.

Or maybe you're tight with Jesus already but you still are struggling. Chaos still seems to find you and all you want at the end of the day is peace and satiation. Well, as my mama always tells me, "life isn't meant to be fun, life is a whole lot of hard work," and she would never lie to me. 

Even the best of us at some point are on the fame and happiness game. If only we get those this or that or a promotion or a new job or more fit or more friends then we can settle down. We just need a little more of this or that but where do we draw the line? I push myself to strive for excellence and to work harder and achieve success and I will keep working hard and you should totally do the same thing. It's more than okay to want to be great. I want to be great and I don't think that is something to be ashamed of.

What matters is why you are doing that. If you think that the next step is going to finally make you happy with life and give you a heart full of joy and peace, I will gladly give you the dose of tough love reality: it won't! If you think promotions, friends, cake or even drugs, sex and rock n' roll will make you happy then why is 60% of the world on anti-depressants and rehab center's are popping up faster than weeds?

Honestly, what I feel is an unexplainable feeling. Even the words perfect happiness, bliss, satiation and whatever else I used, cannot properly define how it feels to live life with peace and joy and without fear of the future. I still struggle; I still experience disappoint, regret and sadness; I don't always know what I am doing or what is going on but I still have a peace and joy because Jesus happens to know the answer when I do not.

Call him maybe.

He has the answers you're looking for.