Don't worry, Be happy.

  
     I should be doing homework... really. I have about 3 more hours and its midnight, but its one of those nights where my mind just goes off to do its own thing. I have been blogging for a few months now and it is getting the point where I will just be sitting somewhere and thoughts just pure into my head and they won't stop. Its that point where I have to surrender and just write. 
     I got to talk to my mom today for longer than usual tonight and it got me thinking. Thinking about how life would be had I not moved to California. I am confident in the fact that life would be completely different than how it has turned out thus far. I am pretty sure that I would either a) be married or b) be engaged and planning a wedding. Just piecing together stories and conversations and endless Facebook stalking and the nature of the slavic culture puts me at that conclusion. Not saying it is right or wrong because everyone has their own plan and life story, just saying life would be a whole lot different.
     Talking to friends tonight, we ended at "Classes are only going to get harder from here and life is only getting to get more complicated, I can't imagine fitting a boyfriend in." And this is a valid statement, entering upper division classes and jobs and internships and maintaing a 3.5 gpa isn't really the best basis for relationships. 10 years ago, even as a little child, I was convinced I was going to get married soon. Thats just the kind of culture I come from. High school ends and married life begins. Fast forward, I am in California at a 4 year university with 2 years of graduate school in the not so distant future. 
     Ironically, I am not worried. Do I ever worry? Sure I do. In my head, I know worries and stress get me no where, just maybe grow a few gray hairs here and there, but I still worry and stress sometimes. But more then ever, I have seen the wisdom in living life one day at a time. Thinking about it all at once can just be the most overwhelming thing, its almost like a psychological trap. 
     The beautiful thing is that I am not alone, trying to figure out life. I have a loving family, loving friends, and a loving Savior. I continue to challenge myself to live simply. Live fully and live for others. I challenge you to do the same. Focus on the now and those around you. There is a difference between living and actually being alive.